🌿 Givers vs. Takers: Servanthood or Self-Centeredness? 🌿
- overcomerinhim1021
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
The Bible teaches us that greatness comes through servanthood, not self-centeredness. Jesus Himself said: “Whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant” (Matthew 20:26). Yet in today’s world, we see the stark difference between those who live to give and those who live to take.
🔹 Givers reflect the Spirit of Christ.
🔹 Takers often reflect a narcissistic spirit—ego-driven, entitled, and self-serving.
Characteristics of Takers (Narcissistic Spirit)
Always asking, rarely giving.
Feel entitled to others’ time, energy, and resources.
Use manipulation, guilt, or charm to get what they want.
Lack empathy and concern for others.
Drain rather than pour into relationships.
Strive for control, power, and recognition.
Characteristics of Givers (Servanthood Spirit)
Generous with time, love, and resources.
Serve out of genuine care, not for recognition.
Empathetic and compassionate.
Create safety and peace in relationships.
Value others as God’s creation.
Model Christ by laying down their lives in love.
🛡️ 7 Ways Givers Can Protect Themselves from Takers
1. Set firm boundaries—Jesus withdrew when needed (Luke 5:16).
2. Pray for discernment before saying “yes.”
3. Limit access to your energy and time.
4. Recognize manipulation and refuse to engage.
5. Stay rooted in your worth as a child of God, not in pleasing others.
6. Surround yourself with mutual, healthy relationships.
7. Remember: “Do not cast your pearls before swine” (Matthew 7:6).
👑 Godly Men: Leading Homes through Servanthood
When men lead like Christ, they set the tone of the home. Servant leadership isn’t weakness—it’s strength under control. Jesus washed His disciples’ feet (John 13:14–15). He led through humility, love, and sacrifice.
10 Ways Men Can Shift the Atmosphere in Their Homes:
1. Pray with and over your family daily.
2. Serve your wife and children before serving yourself.
3. Listen with humility, not pride.
4. Be quick to forgive and slow to anger (James 1:19–20).
5. Model work ethic and integrity.
6. Create stability through consistency and faithfulness.
7. Use words to build up, not tear down (Ephesians 4:29).
8. Lead in worship—let children see you in the Word.
9. Handle conflict with gentleness, not harshness.
10. Show sacrificial love—“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25).
🌸 The Result: Peace & Unity vs. Discord & Stress
When givers protect themselves wisely and men lead through servanthood, families flourish. A home led by Christ-like love becomes a safe refuge, filled with peace instead of chaos.
When women feel safe, they bloom & thrive the way God intended. A woman of God will naturally respect & honor a husband who provides this for her.
When this happens, everyone wins! 🙌
👉 Ask yourself: Am I living as a giver in Christ or a taker for self?
👉 Men, are you leading as Christ led—through sacrifice and servanthood?
👉Women, are you displaying a servant heart & expressing gratitude when your husband leads through servanthood?
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.” – Philippians 2:3
If this applies to you and you need professional support to come alongside you in your healing journey, who has also been there, take that first step by reaching out to me to set up a time to discuss what that would look like and begin your BREAKTHROUGH to taking your life back and become the woman God created you to be.
Connie Wunderly, BSN, RN, NC-BC, BC-MHC
Board Certified Trauma Informed Nurse Coach
Christian Mental Health Coach (American Academy of Christian Counselors)
Certified Narcissistic Abuse Specialist
Certified Somatic Experiencing, Positive Psychology, & Brainspotting Practitioner
Someone Who Has been There and Overcome
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