There is something deeply broken in a system where the wounded are questioned more than the ones who caused the wounds. If you’ve ever found yourself over-explaining… Trying to prove your pain… Replaying conversations to justify your reality… You’re not crazy—you’ve been conditioned. Abuse—especially emotional, verbal, and psychological—trains you to believe you are the problem. It keeps you in cycles of confusion, self-doubt, and striving for approval that will never come. B

Many trauma survivors don’t just “prefer texting”… they’ve learned it as a form of safety. If you’ve walked through a narcissistic or high-conflict relationship, you understand this on a deep, embodied level. When you’ve endured: • circular conversations that never resolve • rage and emotional volatility • gaslighting that makes you question your reality • constant interruptions, accusations, and control Your nervous system adapts. From a trauma-informed, evidence-based persp

You can quote scripture. You can go to church. You can say all the “right” things… …but if there is:  ❌ Control ❌ Rage ❌ Gaslighting ❌ Lack of accountability ❌ Emotional or verbal abuse ❌ Cheating (including pornography)  ❌ Addiction  ❌ Neglect of her needs ❌ Over burdening with responsibility  ❌ Empty promises ❌ Financial irresponsibility ❌ Parental neglect or abuse  That is not the heart of Jesus. The standard isn’t perfection… The standard is fruit. 📖 “By their fruit you

Each morning, I get up while it's still dark. I get my coffee, do my workout, & have my 'God Time' where I pray, study Scripture, reflect, listen, journal, & end with listening to worship music while I start getting ready for the day. I've done it now for over 30 years. I've memorized countless verses, felt the loving conviction of the Holy Spirit, grown, healed, stumbled, cried, repented, rejoiced, pleaded for others, found peace during troubled times, felt held

Few things cut as deeply as the emotional whiplash of a man who once made you feel cherished—like his soulmate—only to turn cold, distant, or even cruel. This is not just heartbreak; it’s mind games and manipulation at its worst. It leaves you questioning everything: Was it real? Did I imagine the love? Was I just being used? This kind of emotional manipulation is often intentional. Whether rooted in narcissistic tendencies or deep-seated immaturity, the goal is control. Firs

Proverbs 6:16-19 outlines seven things the Lord hates—actions and attitudes that are detestable to Him. Among these, we find "a false witness who pours out lies and a person who stirs up conflict in the community." These warnings are not just ancient words of caution; they are timeless truths that call us to examine the way we live, especially in our interactions with others, and particularly within the church. "Causing Division is Like Murder" The Word of God often likens th

Oftentimes, while good intentioned, we have unknowingly given our power over to a narcissistic spirit out of the desire to be submissive, meek, or nice. We may have found ourselves in a destructive relationship or situationship and have mistakenly thought that the answer was to be nice by submitting to one that feeds off of power, control, and reactions based on manipulation.   However, the Word calls us to be Holy, not nice! Bullies don’t change when they are catered to.   G

I wanted to be a wife. A mama. A homemaker. A homeschool mom. And for around 20 years, that’s exactly what I was — a stay-at-home, homeschooling mama whose greatest joy was nursing babies, managing my home, cooking meals, growing a garden, canning, making candles & homemade bread, doing daily Bible study with my children, nurturing their hobbies & skills, and creating a place of safety and warmth. My heart has always been in my home. But our lives blew up because of the choic

There’s something sacred about the early morning hours—before the noise, before the demands, before the world wakes up and starts pulling.It ’s peaceful. It’s still. It’s holy ground for me. Mornings are when I sit with my coffee ☕, my Bible 📖, and my gratitude. Another day to serve Him.Another day to love my family.Another day to pour into my community. Jesus Himself modeled this rhythm: “Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and w

Adult clergy sexual abuse (ACSA) is real. It is harmful. And it is NEVER consensual in the way healthy relationships are meant to be. Clergy are in positions of spiritual authority, trust, and power—and when that authority is used to coerce, groom, or sexually engage with someone under their care, it is abuse. Period. Even if the perpetrator claims they “loved” the person. Even if they “never meant harm.” Even if they insist the other person “consented.” That dynamic is a p

Although the majority of my clients are women healing from narcissistic abuse by men, the spirit of narcissism is not gender-specific. It can operate through men or women, leaders or laypeople, spouses, parents, friends, coworkers, and even within church spaces. 📖Scripture warns us plainly: “But know this: In the last days perilous times will come. For people will be lovers of self… lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its powe

I’ve been that woman. The one who was: Abandoned Rejected Orphaned Abused Falsely accused while I was the one actually being abused Betrayed by those I only ever loved and helped Afraid Confused Making a poor choice because of a wound from another Basing my value on body imperfections Left wondering if I’d ever be enough... I’ve cried until I threw up. I’ve laid in bed wondering if anyone even cared. I’ve watched my children suffer at the hands of someone who was supposed to

An apology without change is not reconciliation—it’s just manipulation & a pause button on the same pattern. In healthy relationships, words matter—but repair requires action. Biblically, being “sorry” was never meant to be the end of the story. God’s model includes repentance, responsibility, and restoration. 👉 Saying “I’m sorry” acknowledges pain. 👉 Repair addresses the damage and changes future behavior. Biblical “Sorry” Looks Like Repentance In Scripture, repentance is

One of the greatest shifts we can make as Overcomers in Him is choosing gratefulness instead of entitlement. These two postures produce drastically different fruit in our lives—spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and even physically. THE FRUIT OF ENTITLEMENT Entitlement is rooted in a lack of faith. It whispers, “God owes me… people owe me… life owes me.” 👉And the fruit shows up quickly: Complaining Anxiety Depression Irritability Criticism Blame shifting Resentment Emotion

In today’s world, those who serve on the front lines are facing more trauma than ever before. Not just the trauma you witness on the job, but the secondary trauma—the emotional weight of what you must see, hear, absorb, and still keep going. What many don’t understand is that first responders and medical professionals are some of the most impacted by unprocessed trauma, yet are often the least supported emotionally. And this trauma doesn’t stay at work. It shows up in: 🚨 Bur

If you’ve ever been the scapegoat in someone else’s story, you develop a certain awareness—a radar. And once it’s activated, there is zero tolerance for it. I know this deeply. After my first divorce, I was made out to be the problem by people who didn’t know the truth or understand narcissistic abuse. By people in the church who were clueless but eager for something to gossip about. By people who exaggerated some things and completely fabricated others to create a narrative

Because when God defends you, you don’t have to. If you’ve survived narcissistic abuse, you know this pain well: 🔹 Triangulation – lies passed through others 🔹 Flying monkeys – people manipulated to attack your character 🔹 Bearing false witness – accusations meant to provoke, intimidate, or silence you But here is the truth that sets Overcomers free: The Lord is your Defender, your Redeemer, and your Vindicator. “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” (Ex

Rumination. Overthinking. Replaying. Spiraling. Most survivors don’t realize these aren’t “just thoughts” — they’re protector parts trying to keep you safe. But you can retrain your brain. God made our brains to be neuroplastic which means we can rewire & learn new defaults. Introducing the Redirection Bracelet Method-A Form of Pattern Interrupt 💗🖤🤍 A simple, science-backed/evidence based + faith-filled tool we use in Overcomers in Him. ✨ How it works: Wear a stretchy b

One of the most subtle — and spiritually dangerous — aspects of narcissistic abuse is how it drains your oil, the anointing and strength God gives you to live, love, parent, grow, and fulfill your purpose. A narcissist does not pour into you… they pull from you.  Sometimes quietly.  Sometimes chaotically.  Always consistently. And that constant drain eventually leaves even the strongest woman running on fumes. 🛢️ They Drain Your Oil Through Daily Chaos Narcissistic individua

Over four years as a single mom and many more years as a "single wife," I’ve walked a road many of you know too well. It’s a path marked by heartbreak, endurance, and, ultimately, healing. Some of my deepest healing from a toxic 23-year marriage came during my time as a single mom, while other pieces of my heart were mended in the midst of a future relationship. Healing from severe complex trauma (C-PTSD) is not a straight line—it’s a journey. A long, messy, and deeply transf